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Blended Family Friday: Chicken Dinner

Andrew told me, “It’s the best way to win. The best. But it’s the worst way to lose.

Andrew and I were sitting on the couch watching the Portland vs Kansas City soccer game when the game went into a shootout. Very rarely does a shootout ever have to go through an entire team of players to the point where the goal keepers have to take shots. The game ended with the last keeper missing the shot. Portland won, and they play the Vancouver Whitecaps on Sunday.

Andrew grew up playing soccer, so he knows the above statement to be true. The risk, the expectation, the pressure, the exhaustion. With each shot taken, hope soars and then just as fast, gets hit down.

Marriage is like that. We put all our ducks in a row and hope for the best, right? While we’re dating, we put all our good shit up front. We’re like, hey. We make sure we don’t have stubbly bits and that we’re always wearing our good underwear. As the years go by and the lineup gets shadier and shadier, in desperation we start throwing out our donkey players. Before you know it we’re paying $180/hour to a therapist that doesn’t know how to spell our last name and we’re googling 2 bedroom basement suites on Craigslist.

Sometimes it falls apart.

It’s the best way to win. The best. But it’s the worst way to lose.


{ 16 comments… add one }
  • Gretchen | Gretchruns November 6, 2015, 2:03 am

    I’m not really a fan of soccer (or hockey..which I consider soccer on ice) but I LOVE watching the shootouts. It’s the most entertaining part in my opinion, and like you said it’s so intense and pressure is really high. Love it.

    One thing that I really love about Dan and our relationship is that from the beginning I never felt like I had to be perfect. He told me I was my most beautiful when I never tried- no makeup..hair messed up..hoodie and sweats on. He never wanted me to hide anything and loved me more and more with every secret he found out. That’s how I knew he was the one, and realized just how lucky I was to have him (sorry..it’s morning so I’m feeling sappy)

    • suzy.suzyheather@gmail.com November 6, 2015, 9:15 am

      I’m not just blowing smoke up your ass when I say this but I see where Dan is coming from. You’re a natural beauty. Like J Crew or a model on the cover of Real Simple magazine. I love all your clothes, your hair, and I bet you smell amazing. I’m right, aren’t I? I know I’m right. I love watching the shootouts too but I have to admit I like the soft doughy salted pretzels at the games just a bit more.

      • Gretchen | Gretchruns November 6, 2015, 2:21 pm

        omg j crew model!? You are way to generous!! That’s a great compliment though- those are the types of women that I look up to and say “I wish I looked like that”! love ya girl 🙂

        • suzy.suzyheather@gmail.com November 6, 2015, 11:38 pm


  • Susie @ SuzLyfe November 6, 2015, 4:47 am

    There is something to be said for a solid victory. I don’t need the excitement of a shootout like some people do.

    • Gretchen | Gretchruns November 6, 2015, 4:57 am

      AKA me haha!! Give me the drama!

      • suzy.suzyheather@gmail.com November 6, 2015, 9:11 am

        We can be drama queens together and rule our unruly kingdom.

    • suzy.suzyheather@gmail.com November 6, 2015, 9:10 am

      Wise words, wise words as usual.

  • Heather@hungryforbalance November 6, 2015, 10:29 am

    Oh you and your clever titles!
    Marriage is a scary thing when you really think about it (which, I of course try not to)!
    All the bullshit fronts that we put up in our hopes to catch someone worthy enough to avoid a lifetime of loneliness. All the ways we pretend that our shit doesn’t stink and that we wake up looking beautiful. Only to accidentally let a fart slip one day. We look over in horror, hoping that he didn’t notice. He did notice and he is laughing. Because shit stinks and marriage is hard. But it’s also great.
    Love you and thank you for this reminder!

    • suzy.suzyheather@gmail.com November 6, 2015, 1:33 pm

      Can I just say how much I appreciate the fact that you notice my clever titles and that you GET THEM?!? Love you too. xo All of you. Your farts, your hot pink pants, everything.

  • Laura @ This Runner's Recipes November 6, 2015, 10:31 am

    My ducks were not in a row when Ryan and I started dating. I was debating applying for a Fulbright to spend a year overseas, I was applying for grad schools, and working three jobs and taking 19 credits. Meanwhile, he was graduating and looking for a job. I tried so hard to keep a good front, but I’d fall apart a lot early in our relationship. In retrospect, that early vulnerability definitely helped us make for a strong relationship, much more than if either of us had made it look like smooth sailing.
    But I’ve always been awful at soccer.

    • suzy.suzyheather@gmail.com November 6, 2015, 1:32 pm

      Vulnerability always brings out strength!

  • Kristen November 6, 2015, 1:45 pm

    I’m not a sports person, but I do like drinking at the bars with all the cute guys who are there to watch the games (don’t tell my husband).

    When I met my hubby I had NO intentions of dating him, so I was 100% myself right from the get-go. Farting, burping, no make-up – oh yeah, I was a real catch. But the best part was that I was also 100% vulnerable and we challenge each other to continue to be vulnerable even when life and marriage sucks big hairy poop-smeared balls.

    • suzy.suzyheather@gmail.com November 6, 2015, 11:40 pm

      I can’t wait to drink with you again! I am SO EXCITED about meeting your new baby and snuggling her. Drop her off with me anytime and then you and Greg can walk over to the pub!

  • Meghan@Cleaneatsfastfeets.com November 12, 2015, 12:29 pm

    Oh hell, my Hubby has seen more than my stubbly bits and still hasn’t looked for a two bedroom basement apartment on Craig’s list. Quite the opposite in fact. He went and got me knocked up stubbly bits and all.

    • suzy.suzyheather@gmail.com November 12, 2015, 2:12 pm

      <3 <3 <3

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