≡ Menu

The Runs

The Runs header image

Wait For It

My friend Laura posted something on Facebook today that gave me a good laugh. Although I don’t take residence with a dog now, I sure used to be a dog owner, and so I relate to her post.


Dog owners or not, I think we can all relate. Because we have all at some point taken our loved ones outside at 4am, required them to watch us stress about a bit while we circled around, sniffed the perimeter of Wasted Time, crossed the borders of End This Already, all while they’ve loyally stood by us and waited, patiently, until we were done. Then they’d let us back inside, watch us drop a deuce behind the recliner in the corner, and followed us back to our stale beds, our tails tucked between our legs, and, for the sake of love, we’d both clean up, and go back to sleep.

“The best use of life is love. The best expression of love is time.

The best time to love is now.”

-Rick Warren

After the bullshit election, Laura focused on the things we do have control over, and so she gave her readers a challenge: to do one loving thing that day that will contribute to world awesomeness. So, I did. I wrote it down and then I messaged her on Facebook and pretty much begged her to delete my comment so I’d get out of it but alas, Laura is Laura and so she held me accountable. So, I did it. I did the stupid loving thing I said I’d do, and it was more than I thought it would be, which is how love works.

What absolute shitty thing do you feel like you should probably do to show some love this weekend?



My body is being a bit… weird. Hormoney-weird. The last time this happened, I had to cut my mileage back to 50 mile weeks, which is what I’m going to do again.

After my injury in Mexico, I vowed to cut my mileage from 80-100 miles/per week to a much more realistic 50-60, but lately the 50-60 has been turning to 60+ miles per week and so now I have to write this out for accountability, that I gotta cut it back to 50 for a month or so to see if I balance out a bit.

Okay? Will you keep me accountable?

Meg told me she’d help me with weight training. I know I’ll need something to help me get the angst out, and I don’t know what the hell I’m doing with yoga and I’m much more confident lifting weights than doing upward dog salutations. I’m not allowed to hit people, and I hate giving the government so much tax money for ciggies, so I’m just going to have to pull up my big girl thong, slap on the acne lotion and deal.

I’m already at 22 miles, and it’s frigging TUESDAY. (Now it’s Wednesday, and I “only” ran 6 miles today so I’m at 28 so far). Jesus take the wheel.


My new dashboard Jesus is going to be my daily reminder to not run so much. So help me God I’ll need it, with these weeks leading up to Christmas and all.

I need a meme or an inspirational quote to help me NOT run. I HAVE PROBLEMS. So, do you have a quote for me? A Bible verse? A singing telegram?

Do you have anything on your dashboard?

Do you store candy in your car? 



For my other day in the life posts, I’ve made sure to choose a weekday so that I could impress you all with how busy I am, so to paint a truer picture I decided to choose a Sunday on a weekend where we only have Callum at home with us.

This particular Sunday (two Sundays ago), Andrew was doing an open house in a city about 45 minutes away from here so he left home at around 11 and got home by about 5.

I woke up at 7:45am, had coffee and then got ready for a run but Callum woke up and Andrew needed to do some work before the open house, so I stayed home. I made Callum a pancake, Andrew a coffee and myself another cup of coffee. I snuggled up beside Callum to watch TV for a bit.

At around 9, after Andrew had finished his paperwork, I ran 5 miles while Andrew stayed home with Callum. When I got home I made Andrew’s lunch (bag of veggies, a huge iced water with lemon, and crackers & cheese) and then I put some broccoli into the oven to roast and heated myself up a bowl of veggie soup. I put laundry in, had a quick shower, ate half a Vega bar (peanut butter chocolate is the BEST), and some iced lemon water.


Then, I scooped cat litter and waited for Callum to have his poop. He likes to hide behind the chair to do it. Maybe one day he will actually go in the toilet rather than repeatedly dropping a brown bear in his pants.


I packed the now clean Callum up into the Hotyssey and we took off for the grocery store. While I was there, I picked up some anti-death wipes for my butt cheek zit problem.


Then we checked out Andrew’s sister’s family’s new house, and came home. Callum and I shared a cheese omelette and while it was cooking, I poked around in the goodies cupboard and came up with a couple of snacks: sour cream and onion chip fake cheese and mustard sandwiches:


And chunky peanut butter and milk chocolate chips on crackers:


I did more dishes, and more laundry and then made myself a hot boozy coffee.


Andrew came home, got changed, and then we invited his parents over for Indian food. While he went to pick up the food, I wrote a couple of blog posts and sipped on a Ceasar. We all sat down and had butter chicken, garlic naan, rice pilaf, aloo gobi and aloo tikki. It was phat. And it made us fat. I made everyone hot boozy coffees for dessert (I skipped out on beer and the coffee as I was way too full and felt just fine with my coffee and Ceasar from before), we put Callum to bed at 7:30, and then the Slanes went home.

And now for the not so pretty part. These parts are always so tough to write, because I want to make sure I am being helpful and not hurtful. Okay so let’s see…so Kylah popped over at around 9:30 to print out her report for school (her mom doesn’t have a printer) and she seemed a little down. So Andrew and I spent the rest of the evening just talking about how we can help her, which, you know, is great.

But unfortunately it involved some conflict from Wendy, which, you know, is fine. But hey, that’s life and this is our new normal and we make the best of it. So while we sat naked on the couch together (we were totally naked on the couch), I ate a donut with chocolate sprinkles and milk, and we vowed that the next day would be much better. We sauntered up to bed at around midnight, held hands while Andrew farted Indian food farts while we giggled uncontrollably and went to sleep.

Do you like Indian food?

Americans, do you drink Bloody Marys? (The Canadian version is called a Ceasar and they’re made with Clamato juice).

Do you eat fake cheese? (Kraft Singles)


Week in Review

Hi guys! Here’s yet another Week in Review, hosted by Meghan from Clean Eats Fast Feets. My week was a bit of a different kind of week because there was no school on Thursday and Friday for parent/teacher meetings. I know, right? This is exciting. I bet you can hardly wait to read about it.

Every second Monday, Andrew and I gorge ourselves on self-soothing crutches such as Indian food, red wine, whiskey and peppermint mochas, and we walk around the house naked, let the cookie crumbs settle into the corners of the kitchen, and generally just get out all our zero fucks before the big kids come back on Tuesday. So, that’s pretty much we did on Monday.

Tuesday was all about damage control: I washed sheets, did laundry, cleaned the house, and worked on my book quite a bit. It was nice to have Katie and Freddy back here on Tuesday night, and I spent the evening cooking up some lasagna for dinner and to store in the freezer for another day. I was pretty much the Domestic Goddess.



I took Jake to the bank on Wednesday to get his account lined up for his new job. He’s working as a lift operator at Hemlock Ski Resort. I’m so proud of that kid. Aaaaaaand now I’m going to cry. Okay so while Andrew took Ethan to his parent/teacher meeting that night, I stayed home with Callum and Katie and we watched Call the Midwife. Jason brought Freddy to his soccer practice, which really helped me out a lot. There. I met my “say one nice thing about Jason” quota for the year. I don’t have a quota for Wendy. I’m backspacing a lot right now; you just can’t see it.

So Thursday was my day for teacher meetings, so Freddy watched Callum for me while I took Katie to hers, and then I dropped Katie off to watch Callum for me while I took Freddy to his. Then my mom came over to play with Callum and hang out with Katie, so I took the opportunity to go for a run and work on my book. It was amazing! Callum was in bed by 7 and Katie and I had SO MUCH FUN playing Uno! We ordered wings and breadsticks, played games and hooped in the garage.


Friday was a bit of a drag, although the weather was great. I took a photo of the wild scene behind our complex. Apparently someone overdosed on fentanyl and his girlfriend called 9-1-1.


Katie babysat Callum for me while I went for a run and then we visited the kitties at the pet store and had a Starbucks date. Katie had dance at 5, Kylah and Ethan came right then too, and then we spent the night setting up the Christmas tree and eating stew.

This is what a blended family Christmas tree looks like. Oh, and to the left, you’ll notice my “work area” has now moved from a tidy little desk station to a whole area spilling with wine and papers. If you look closely, you’ll see that I’ve got a sparkly little reindeer that keeps me company while I work.


The battery-operated Christmas train that I got for Callum is a piece of shit. It doesn’t stay on the tracks, so he carries it around the house with him. And he brings it into the van, into the grocery store, and into his bed. Oh! He got a new bed! I bought him a toddler bed off of Craigslist for forty bucks!


Thank you to my dear father’s DNA, I have bashed my MF shins on the corner of that bloody thing too many times to count. I can’t even yelp in pain or I’ll wake Callum up so I have to die inside, several times, until I get to the bottom of the stairs where I crumple into a heap of hot mess. Speaking of which, I also bought curlers at the dollar store to see if they’d help to tame my wild mane.


They didn’t, but the wine took the edge off.


Freddy’s soccer game was canceled on Saturday, so I had the chance to run 10 miles with Lora which was great because it’s been a while. The rest of Saturday was pretty tame. It poured rain so we stayed inside and snuggled, and we went to bed early.

Now it’s Sunday afternoon and Callum is eating chips on the couch while watching Paw Patrol. Andrew is almost home from Kylah’s soccer game and then he has to get ready to go to a listing. Not the most exciting day, but I do have a knack for making something out of nothing.

What are your self-soothing crutches?

Do you have a “say one thing nice per year” quota for anyone in your life? Do you clench your teeth when you play nice? Or squeeze your bum cheeks together?

Have you ever worn curlers?

My mom used to force me to put curlers in my hair on Saturday nights before church on Sundays. I hated it. I hated it when she’d tug at my hair and pull the sections up into the foam rollers and I hated sleeping with those things digging into my scalp and I hated it when she’d pull them out in the morning and fuss over the styling process. And I hated church.



Mileage Monday

Hey you guys! I’m sorry I went missing a bit toward the end of last week. I think I just got caught up in all the American holidaying with my friends down south that I felt like putting my feet up a bit in the blog world. I’m back in the saddle this week, though, and I’ve got some good stuff lined up.

I ticked off a solid 67 miles this week although to be totally honest, they were all slow; I didn’t do a single hard workout. Hopefully I’ll be back at it next week with something a little more hot and bothersome. Also, I’m not sure if you guys notice, but I don’t take running selfies very often. It’s not like I feel like I have to get all dolled up for the camera (although 9 times out of 10 I do look like a swamp donkey before and after a run); it has more to do with the fact that when I get the chance to run, I just take off like a bat out of hell just so I can fit it in. As soon as I come home, I have to jump into the shower otherwise my whole body turns blue. Hmm… maybe post-running selfies would be entertaining after all!

Monday– So, I ran an easy 10 miles in the morning and then got a bunch of stuff done during the day so I took Callum out in the stroller for 5 miles. I wasn’t sure how long we were going to go but he really enjoyed the ride, so I went for it!

Tuesday– Just 8 miles in the early morning.

Wednesday– I took Callum for a 6 mile run in the running stroller and then when we got home, I hopped onto the treadmill for a quick 3 miles.

Thursday– I ran 5 miles in the dark morning and then my mom came over to hang with the kids (no school today or tomorrow) so that I could have some time to myself, so I ran 5 more slow miles while listening to a podcast. I also got to work on my book and run errands without a screamy toddler! It was heavenly!

Friday– Incredibly gorgeous day to run! Katie watched Callum in the morning and I took off for 6 miles with some good music.

Saturday– Well, the weather sure took a turn. I was sad that Freddy’s soccer game got canceled because of the weather, and it certainly wasn’t the best to run in, but I’m so thankful that I got to meet Lora for a 10 miler today!

Sunday– Chilled out for a cold and rainy 9 miler this morning before Andrew left with the kids for soccer.

Are you more likely to take a selfie while running or while drinking? Trail or pub washroom? Where would you rather have sex? In a trail or in a pub washroom?



My Postpartum Running Journey

I started my blog in December of 2014, when our youngest child was nine months old, so while I kept track of my running mileage on Daily Mile, I didn’t start sharing it publicly until I started my blog. I know that for me, each time I had a baby, I’d look online for any information I could find about returning to exercise during the postpartum period but I really didn’t find a whole lot. So, I thought I would share my postpartum running journey here!

Callum was born just after midnight on March 3rd, 2014, but I had been in “labour” since March 1st. I started bleeding, so Andrew and I headed to the hospital where they admitted me. I was already 3-4cm dilated, and my other deliveries had been swift, so we thought this one would be too. Not so. Despite being nearly 4 weeks early, Callum was nearly 8 lb. I was about to start pushing when his heart rate dropped dramatically so the doctor pushed the emergency red button on the wall, and said to me, “Susan, your baby’s struggling so you need to give the push of your life right now and get him out.” One push, and he was out.


For the first week, I did nothing. By the Wednesday of the second week (March 12th) I was able to run a slow 5 miles. I so clearly remember that run! It was tough, but euphoric. The fresh air felt unreal. I ran 7 miles on Thursday, 6 on Friday and 5 on Sunday. By my third postpartum week I ran a whopping 50 miles for the week (a long run of 12 miles on Sunday, March 23rd).

It looks like I consistently ran 50 miles for the next several weeks (with a 70 mile week in my 5th week postpartum) and by May 2nd, I ran my first 20 miler. By 6 months postpartum I was consistently running 70 mile weeks.


Now, obviously this isn’t for everyone. BUT. Most stuff out there is so incredibly conservative just because of the nature of the whole scene. I mean, you’ve got a brand new baby, a new body, major hormones, breastfeeding issues (needing to keep up the supply), that most people tend to err on the side of caution. WHICH IS GOOD. But caution looks different for each person and not just for each person but for each postpartum experience (there are so many variables!) so there is no right or wrong way to do it, and there really are no rules to follow (except obvious ones, made by your doctor or whatever, if you’ve got shit going on) so it’s up to you and me to listen to our bodies and go with it!

Did anyone new stumble upon this blog post while searching for postpartum exercise tips? Do you have any questions or comments for me? Did I freak you out?



Week In Review: Perspective

I’m typing this Week in Review post at the very last second but if she’ll still have me, I’m linking up with Meghan from Clean Eats Fast Feets for this week’s WIR.

You guys are probably sick of me telling you this but last week was filled with nap time struggles. Callum is on day 3 of no naps and while it provides us with a giant slot of adult time in the evenings, I tend to go a little bat shit by about 3pm in the afternoon. I end up just giving the kid my phone, tell him to have a go at it and I curl up into the fetal position in front of the fire with a coffee. Once the caffeine sparks my brain up again, I’m okay, especially since by 5 o’clock it’s socially acceptable to pour a giant glass of wine while I make dinner.

For the first couple of days, however, I let him have a half hour nap in the stroller, but let’s just say it was very difficult to wake him after that!


My friend Kristen and her baby came over on Tuesday and while I thought Callum would be smitten with Clara, he was rather… territorial. Once he settled down a bit (stopped whipping his toys at the baby), Kristen and I could actually hold a decent conversation and it was nice to get in a visit.

I had to grab a few things at Home Sense, and while I was there I saw this broken “JOY” sign on clearance. Who on earth would buy a broken “JOY” sign?!? Is that a bad omen or WHAT?!


My friend Renata came up from Tacoma, Washington for our friend’s husband’s memorial service, so she and I got together at Wendel’s in Fort Langley for coffees. We went for a short walk to the park so that Callum could play while we caught up on life. Then on Saturday, Andrew’s parents watched Callum for us so that Andrew and I could go to the service. Our friend Jamie is the strongest woman I know. Her husband was only 40, and they’ve got three small kids. The service was amazing, and I have no doubt that Sean would have loved it. Cancer is rampant, it seems. We need a cure something fierce.

After the service, Andrew and I headed over to the Cactus Club for lunch and we talked and talked about life and God and religion, and all the deep and meaningful things. Then that evening we had Andrew’s parents over for some drinks and more great conversation.

Sunday was such a relaxing day. I decided to do a day in the life post based on that Sunday because I want to show you guys what a Sunday would look like with just Callum at home with me; it looks much different than a weekday! We ended the day with Indian food with Andrew’s parents (they’re super cool!) and some homemade boozy coffees.


Kylah popped in at around 9:30 to print off a report for school, and then Andrew and I had a really good talk about kids, divorce, the struggles that come with it all, and what we can do to make the best of it. We fell asleep holding hands. I’m so thankful that Andrew is such a giving, feeling, and caring parent to our kids.

Do you guys drink boozy coffees? What kind? How do you make them? 

Would you buy that “JOY” sign? 



Mileage Monday

I ran 67 miles this week which is a bit higher than I’d like but there were a few extra stroller miles that beefed up the mileage. Callum’s naps are slowly phasing out, so getting him to nap in the stroller is one way to give his body a short rest so that he can make it to a decent hour without crashing at dinnertime. Although, for the last two days, he hasn’t napped at all and goes to bed early which gives Andrew and I some alone time! It’s a beautiful thing.

Monday– Ugh. So my quads are SO SORE from that long tempo run on Saturday! This is insane! They’re even more sore than after I race a marathon!!! Anyway, I ran a slow 6 miles this morning while I listened to a podcast and then since Callum wouldn’t nap, I pushed him in the stroller for 5 miles and he fell asleep for 10 minutes. I had to wake him up because otherwise he won’t go to bed tonight at a decent hour.

Tuesday– Callum finally napped! FOR TWO HOURS! I ran 13 miles with the last 5 at 7:30 min/mile pace.

Wednesday– I got out for 8 miles in the morning, and then hammered out 4 miles on the treadmill while Callum napped.

Thursday– A few morning treadmill miles and then a few mid-day stroller miles added up to 10 for the day.

Friday– I woke up super early because I slept on my neck wrong and it hurt too much to stay in bed! I’m getting old. Anyway, I ran a slow 6 miles before the kids left for school.

Saturday– Just an easy 5 miles in the early morning before the day got underway.

Sunday– My legs are itching for a fast workout but Callum isn’t napping anymore so my mid-day treadmill tempo runs are tough to get done! I can’t do tempo in the morning, so I just ran a faster paced 10 miles.

Do you guys get zits on your bum? I know I’ve asked this before, but I finally hunkered down and googled it and I was advised to wipe my ass cheeks with an antibacterial wipe to see if that does the trick. I tried it once, so I will keep you posted. If this doesn’t work, I’m going to spread thin layers of benzyl peroxide on my butt before bed or something. Super romantic. Do you guys put zit cream on places other than on your face? I make sure to shower RIGHT after I run, mostly because I like to take care of my vajayjay, but also because it helps with the bum zit problem (supposedly). Do you guys shower right after you work out?


Feel All the Things

I haven’t been this still and stuck in my own brain for years. I watch his jaw work while the milk goes down as I offer up prayers, no, not prayers, petitions? No. Transactions. Yes, transactions: Please God, get this frigging kid to sleep and I promise I’ll stop using the Lord’s name in vain during sex and traffic. It must be day seven, because God rested.

Being stuck there, though, waiting for a toddler to slip into a deep enough sleep for me to be able to roll out of bed and tippy-toe out of the room, feels like a hostage scene. A single one of his feet is smaller than the bites I take out of my Filet ‘O Fish, yet Callum has the power to keep me still for what seems like ever.

We’re starting to phase out Callum’s naps because we’re finding that on the days that he naps, he doesn’t get to sleep until after 11 pm, and honestly, that’s just not going to fly around here. Andrew and I work our asses off all day long and yet, come 11pm, we’re still sitting on the couch while the dictator chases the cat around with a tennis ball? I think not.


Now that he goes to bed at a decent hour, I have to say that I’m going to miss it. I’m going to miss being forced to stay still, stuck in my own brain. I’d run my fingers along my hips, dipping into the deep crevices of my stretch marks, remembering the pain that grew them and the time that healed them. I’d watch my youngest son’s chest rise and fall and wish that I could do the same with Jake for then I’d know that right then, he’s okay. My mind would race, I’d be dying to get back downstairs so that I could curl up into Andrew’s arms with a glass of wine and a bowl of chips, sure, but sometimes I need to be forced to stay still and feel All the Things.

Because sometimes that’s the only way we can finally put them to rest.


A Day in the Life: LOOK AWAY

Hey! I’ve had so many requests for a Day in the Life posts, so I hunkered down and jotted down my day on Monday, point form. The crappy thing is I didn’t take any pictures. So, that kinda sucks, I’m sorry. If I’m a good writer then I wouldn’t need them, but apparently my writing is lame because you guys would way rather read about how many Doritos I eat. When I get famous, these posts will be worth millions.

I woke up (without an alarm) at 6:45 am, came downstairs and made a coffee in my Keurig. I set out a mug and a Starbucks Sumatra coffee pod the night before so that all I have to do is beeline it to the machine and press a button while I have my morning wee. I store contacts, a toothbrush and toothpaste in the powder room off the kitchen so that I don’t wake anyone while I go about my business. Coffee (with cream) in hand, I shuffled into the family room and sat down at the MacBook to do blog stuff.

At 7:15, I threw on some running clothes (I store them in a bin in the linen closet) and ran outside for 6 miles while listening to a podcast called “Yer Mama.” I really really really wanted to like it, but I didn’t.

I got home at 8 or so. Andrew was in the shower, Callum was on the couch, Kylah was already gone and Ethan was getting ready for school. I made myself and Callum some breakfast. I had two pieces of toast with peanut butter and banana, and I made Callum a slice of French toast (I dipped the bread in a mixture of egg and eggnog!). I dissolved a vitamin D tablet in Callum’s juice (80% water, 20% apple juice). He played with his trains while I showered and got ready.

At 10, we headed to WalMart to pick up some paper and envelopes (I help Andrew do his mail-outs for work) and I also picked up the very last Christmas tree train (those junky little trains that circle the Christmas tree) for $29.99. SCORE. The kid loves me for it. Every 20 seconds he asks me if Christmas is coming yet. I may need to set up our tree sooner than later just to get the train out!

On our way home, we swung by the high school to bring Freddy a coffee. See, Jake doesn’t live with us so I come up with every excuse in the book to see that kid, so I’ll often bring him a coffee or some treats just because, but then, I don’t know. I just felt like Freddy needed a turn, right? I try and put myself in their position and feel what they might feel.

Callum and I got home and I heated us up some leftover pizza (meat lovers with red onion). I drowned my slice and a half with a huge glass of milk, and I took the vitamins that I forgot to take that morning. I then polished off the box of macadamia chocolates that Grandpa and Grandma Slane had brought back from Hawaii in September.

Once we finished our feeding, I printed out the mail-outs, folded them and stuffed them into the envelopes, stamped them (oh yeah, I had picked up stamps from the post office earlier too) and then finally at around 1pm, I sat down to have a coffee and a chocolate chip cookie, and published my Week in Review post.

Before I got Callum ready for his nap, I did my (nearly) daily 100 push-ups and stretches. I got Callum into bed by 1:50 but he didn’t fall asleep. FUCK. So by 2:15, I packed him into the running stroller and took him for a 5 mile run. He finally fell asleep at 2:50. If he didn’t nap then he would pass out on the family room area rug at 4:30 and not wake up until the kill me now hour of 4 am the next morning so a mama’s gotta do what a mama’s gotta do.

I woke him up at 3:15, while Andrew arrived home with Ethan. I had a shower, shaved, smoothed coconut oil all over tha body ya, and applied another coat of hot pink onto my toesies. Then I came downstairs a new woman and made lunches for the next day, put meat pies into the oven for dinner (I had to feed everyone early, at 4:45) and ate my huge bowl of veggies for the day (peppers, celery, tomatoes and romaine hearts) and drank my huge ass cup of water.

At 5:15, Andrew and Ethan left for soccer and I put (salted caramel) brownies into the oven (if you’re feeling intimidated by how awesome I am right now, please know that I usually light my dinner on fire, I’ve had poo accidents too many times to count, and I’ve got crops of facial hair that sprout in surprising places every 5 or so days). While the brownies were in the oven (remind me to tell you about my pot brownie story), I poured myself a glass of wine and sat down to respond to blog comments.

Andrew came home, picked Kylah up, brought her to soccer, picked up Ethan from soccer and brought him home. On my second glass, we snuggled on the couch to watch a show that my dad recommended to us but Callum was too noisy and hyper so we gave up and played trains with him.

Honestly? I didn’t document the rest of the night and I can’t for the life of me remember that far back (48 hours and counting). My best guess? It involved wine, chocolate, and sex. Yes! Sex. I remember now. Because Callum only napped 20 or so minutes, he went to bed at a decent hour. OMG I REMEMBER NOW. Okay so when Andrew drove Ethan to school the next day, Ethan said to Andrew, “Daddy, I heard Suzy making these noises last night” and then he went onto imitate me, you know, and made the noises. And Andrew, bless his heart said to him, “Well doesn’t that make you feel good knowing that your daddy and Suzy love each other?” Ethan wasn’t impressed. He was like, “Give me a break, daddy. I’m going to tell Blake about this.”

Do you take vitamin D supplements? Vitamins? Which kind?

Did you guys ever have a Christmas train around your tree?

I feel really bad that I’m not including pictures of anything in this post!